Thursday, 14 July 2011

Sun Burn

I'm lucky or smart enough to have a retirement income that slightly exceeds my fairly modest day-to-day needs.  I could of course expand those needs to soak up the surplus.  But all the extra things I'd spend it on would be time bound.  Every CD or movie you buy, every new car or boat or helicopter, these all require the consumption of the one commodity none of us can buy more of - hours. 

So what drives these people?  It's obviously not money, I've just proved that.  You can't eat, drink, shelter under, smoke, have sex with money.  Money doesn't get you a sunrise or a great conversation or an emotional crisis that expands your consciousness.  So what's left?

It must be power.  They must be deluded enough to believe that power - which is, when it comes down to it, the ability to use money to worsen other people's lives - is paramount, above all else.  How sad.

So what I suggest is that next Tuesday, when Rupert and his fellow-cancers are being dragged kicking and squirming to account for themselves and their insidious corruption of all that used to be good in this world, we all go down the local shop and buy every single copy of the Sun newspaper.  They only cost 30p each, so a fiver should cover it.  Get there early and barge your way to the front of the queue.  Then take them home and have a bonfire, preferably in the street.


  1. Admirable, admirable. Very happy to endorse this noble idea with all the weight at my command and to encourage dancing round the flames with all the frenzy of the morally incensed. Let joy be unconfined.

    (I say this with the tightwad rectitude of one who knows The Sun isn't readily on sale in France.)

  2. So, two redtops down now, one to go. Then we can turn our attention to the blacktops (although Rupes doesn't have much on top at all).
    I worked out, BTW, that of my tens of readers, only about six reside in the UK, so as futile gestures go, this one's a non-starter, unless it goes viral in the next three days.

  3. How do things go viral? Is there a methodology?

  4. It's like chain letters, I think. Forward the link to ten people and ask them to forward it to another ten each, and so on. I wouldn't know, and I don't really care. You probably need to tweet nowadays, which is something I will never ever do.

  5. Unfortunately they will be dragged "to account" in front of a bunch of sleazy expense fiddlers, unless they have been arrested by bribe-takers. The whole things turned into Dianagate - I read it in the Daily Express.

  6. Actually, browsing down my blog a month later, the bonfire in the street might not be such a good idea after all. Though I do wonder how many copies of the Sun got looted.