Sunday, 5 January 2014

Christmas Card Audit 2013

Executive Summary:

The most significant trends this year have been:

·         An alarming fall in the Animals and Birds count.  Robins in particular have been cut by a staggering 600%.
·         A disturbing new category, which I have felt it necessary to incorporate, is Cute Children.  The card-count (4) does not reflect the actual number (inevitably, double counting tends to occur here).  It is at least twice that, all doing nauseatingly cute things involving puppies, sleds, snowballs, etc.
·         Also, there are a few (3) of which I can’t make any sense at all, so have counted as ‘totally abstract’.  I like this trend very much.
·         Glued-on glitter has tripled, from one to three.  I’d make more of this were it not for the fact that (I belatedly notice) all the cards I sent had at least some glued-on glitter. (It’s hell to hoover up, isn’t it?)

The full figures (last year’s in brackets):

Snow/Snowmen/Snowflakes:               6 (2)
Santas/Reindeer:                                  4 (3)
Animals/Birds:                                     4 (17)
 (of which Robins:                               1 (6))
Landscapes:                                         7 (6)
Boats:                                                  0 (0)*
Nativities/Wise Men/Angels:                4 (4)
Christmas trees/Baubles:                      5 (5)
Comical:                                              1 (1)
Puddings:                                             0 (0)*
Cute Children                                      4 (0)
Totally Abstract:                                  3 (0)

*These will be eliminated from the next count, unless there’s a resurgence of boats and puddings.  I have no strong feelings about this.
Special categories:

 Homemade/designed:                          4 (5)
Cards with glued-on glitter:                  3 (1)
Ecards:                                                 1 (1)
Wonderfully weird:                             3 (1)

 There is no Card of the Year award this year.  The overall quality of cards is so much higher that it’s impossible to choose any single one.  All have done well, and all shall have prizes (purely metaphorical ones, you understand).



  1. I advise against buying crackers covered in glued-on glitter. Or at least, not pulling them until all food has been cleared from the table.

    Picking up a handful of cards from the table in front of me, eleven in all, I see that five feature birds, three of them with a robin. I'm not sure if this is representative of the total, but maybe you were just unlucky with this year's wildlife count.

  2. The robin population has departed the cards and landed on our patio and gate post. We seem to have millions (well two anyway).
    We had one pudding card, containing three frankly evil looking (à la Gremlins) puddings. Oddly, this from the most devoutly Christianly religious people we know. Maybe it's indicating a breakaway sect: the pudding cult.
    In-your-face sheep seem to be popular but I won't bleat on about it.

  3. Interesting results. I completely forgot to do my Christmas card audit this year and they are all already in the recycling bin.

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    1. Sorry, pressed the wrong button there! As I said before I rudely removed myself, I have yet to carry out my audit but I definitely know there are pigs this year!

  5. I've done this for three years running now; it should be possible to map trends and open a book on next year's.
    Me, I'm going to design a card featuring power-deprived children huddled round a bonfire of e-watches while the waters lap at the penthouse windows, all smiled on by a benign thinktank guru with a long white beard. Can't fail!