1. Who
didn’t skyfall?
A – the Queen: it was a
professional stuntman called Gary Connery (who doesn’t look anything like her
close up).
2. Which
tower of strength may have been dug up in a car park?
A – Richard III. (He braggingly describes himself thus in Shakespeare’s
play, despite not even being able to rustle up a wee horse).
3. Is
there life on Mars?
A – Yes. The Curiosity rover has discovered
micro-biological traces in rock samples.
They don’t yet know if it’s indigenous, though; it may have been trodden in on the rover's shoes or something. (That happens here.)
4. Where
did water start just after it was stopped?
A – here in the UK, of course:
just after the hosepipe ban was
introduced in the Spring, it started raining and didn’t stop until just before
midnight yesterday.
5. Of
what water-related asset was it said, in June: “Prices have bottomed out and
investors feel this is a good time to buy.”?
A – Privately owned
islands. This was the view of a
representative of a rather specialised estate agency – rush to get yours
tomorrow, as the market will certainly take off following this blog post.
6. Who
is ending the year even more pasty-faced?
A – well, mine was George
Osborne, because of the warm pasty fiasco.
But they’re all looking a bit seedy, aren’t they?
7. Two
events proved that the world won’t end just because someone says it will. Identify them both.
A – 1: The end of the last 400
year Baktun in the Mayan Long Count calendar in 21 December; they simply couldn’t
be bothered to calculate the next one, the wimps. 2 : Discovery at CERN of the Higgs boson,
which explains, among other things, why we have gravity; some said that this discovery
would prompt God to realise the game was up, and shut down the universe. It didn’t happen, so presumably the game isn’t
up yet.
8. How
did someone earn £8,000 a day for knowing nothing?
A – George Entwhistle accepted
a £450,000 pay-off for voluntarily
resigning as BBC DG after 54 days of not having a clue what was going on in the
organisation he was running.
9. What
illumination has finally gone out?
A – the incandescent light
bulb, which is no longer available except in certain specialised forms.
10. Who
threw the best blog party of the year?
A – The incomparable ZZZZZZ!!! (There may have been better ones, but I find
it hard to imagine.)
Happy New Year, everyone!
It wasn't really the Queen? I'm gutted. I was so impressed.
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you so much for your kind words, the loveliness of people coming all the way to deepest darkest Norfolk for a party and then being so friendly and so much fun made it whatever success it was.
Oh and I just feel better all the time about missing Z's party.... If you're going to be a party pooper poop in style...
ReplyDeleteMacy we'll just have to make more effort for the next one eh?!
ReplyDelete