Monday 20 September 2021

The music was always in Tim's head

 This is Zoe, Tim's wife.

Tim's last few posts are quite poignant now. Only two posts this year - "Due to circumstances beyond my control, the whole of 2020 has been cancelled" and in June, one about still being a musician.

He was upset last November, when his friend and member of their 60s band, Dave Anthony's Moods, died, which meant that there were only two of them left out of the original eight.  They hadn't met for a long time but Tim never forgot or stopped caring about a friend.  As music was in his head, so was friendship.  When he met someone after years, they just picked up again as if it had been last week.

Tim died a fortnight ago.  He said that no one but me and his brother ever read this blog regularly any more, so I don't know if anyone else will come upon this, but blogs sometimes just cease with no explanation, which would be a pity.

He and I met online through our blogs about ten years ago, at a time when blogging communities were vibrant, friendly places.  My first husband and I threw a party for blog friends and so many people came and enjoyed it that it became an annual event.  Tim and I hadn't found each other's blogs then, but we did within the next few months and he turned up the next year.  He invited several of us to his 70th birthday party, six weeks later and I went.  My husband Russell couldn't make it, but I fitted it in round a visit to my sister.

Every year afterwards, Tim had something else on and couldn't make it.  But I did call in once on my way to Wiltshire and he gave me lunch.  His superb leek quiche with wholemeal pastry, which I insisted he make for every subsequent party. 

In 2014, my husband died and it was towards the end of the next year that I called on Tim again (salad Nicoise for lunch and I apologise.  I'm writing this on Tim's pc and I only know how to do a cedilla on my Mac - and my own diaeresis, come to that, so just imagine it's there).  I had no idea of starting a relationship.  I absolutely didn't want to, I was rebuilding a life of my own.  But, Tim...I called again and that was it (lamb shanks).  Already good friends, little as we'd ever communicated with each other, we just felt we fitted together.  We were both old enough to feel there wasn't time to waste on being cautious and we married in September 2016.  Our fifth wedding anniversary is on Friday, but he isn't here to celebrate it with me.

To quote the late, great John Ebdon, if you have been, thanks for listening.


1 comment:

  1. Thanks Zoe, that’s very nice. Speak soon.
    With love from Dick x

    ReplyDelete